No Other Way
by Hello000
Summary: There was no going back...no going forward...


Read while listening to "Turn your Face" Little Mix! Don't hate me! Review Please!

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**_No Other Way_**

_"So," she whispered softly as her shoulder grazed his. "What're we telling them?" _

_ He didn't reply; just merely stuck his hands deeper into his pockets and kept his gaze forward. They had been walking around for hours. The stars were out, the moon was bright, and the summer breeze was comforting; all the ingredients for a romantic stroll. Yet, this wasn't the exhilarating first date. This wasn't the night where those three magical words were spoken for the first time. This wasn't even just a random date night between a very stable couple. This was him and Rose, and stable had just never been in the cards for them. _

_ "The truth," he simple spoke with a long tired sigh. "Honesty is the best policy, right?" _

_ He looked back at her expectantly and that's when he noticed she had fallen several steps behind. Her burgundy hair was flowing gracefully down the back of her pink cocktail dress, a few strands wafting in the breeze. Her blue eyes were focused on him, yet not, at the same time. It's as if she was searching him, or searching for him. The him that she had fallen in love with a long time ago, the him that she went from loving to hating on a constant loop, and the him that had somehow slipped through her fingers over and over again. Its then that he let his graze travel down her figure until he caught sight of the sparkle on her hand. It was so small, barely even noticeable, and he begged her several times to let him get her a better one, a bigger one, but she had always refused. It was special this ring, and no matter how flashy the new one would be, it just wouldn't mean as much to her. _

_ He guessed it didn't matter now though. They would never have that stupid fight again. _

_ The thought made his stomach clench unexpectedly. He was surprised, to say the least, because he was beyond certain that he had become numb to all this. She wasn't supposed to have this effect on him anymore, she wasn't supposed to have this hold on him, and she wasn't supposed to be looking at him like that. _

_ He turned his body to face the dirt path again and tried to block out the holes she was burning into his body. Several meters back was a house full of people. It was supposed to be a historical night with the Malfoys and Weasleys together under the Burrow's tilted roof for the first time. It was supposed to be a magical evening filled with laughs, hopes, and dreams for the future. It was supposed to be first night of the rest of their lives…one everyone in that house had been waiting a long time for, and here they were, the guests of honor, just moments away from crushing it all. _

_ "What exactly is the truth?" Her voice cut through the silence like a sharp knife. "Do you even know anymore…do I?" _

_ "The constant migraine, the constant crushing of your heart and soul…the endless amounts of tears and anger…Rose, isn't that truth enough?" _

_ He faced her now and couldn't help but think how ironic this whole setting was. Behind her was nothing but a winding dirt-country road, infront of her was the same. It seemed to metaphorically fit them so well. Their past, their present, their future…it all looked exactly the same to him. So he convinced himself that it was time, it was time for them to just step off the dirt path and forge a new way all together. It was time for them to stop looking back or even forward; they had to look a completely different way. _

_ Her arms hung loosely at her sides and her gaze had finally left his. It was focused on the starry sky now, and from the shining moonlight he could see the tears clearly glistening in those endless blue orbs. Again, ironic...there were always tears when it came to them._

_ "You do realize this is definite, right…there's no going back from this…not this time." _

_Her voice cracked despite her best efforts to keep it steady and unemotional. She had never been good at that though, and maybe that was part of the problem. Both of them were just too emotional, too stubborn, and just too much into getting their feelings across. Whether those feelings were resentment, anger, or even love…one of them always had to top the other. It had always been like that, from the very beginning of this journey. That little unexpected love story that began infront of the Hogwarts Express all those years ago had gone through a lot, they had gone through a lot. Whether it was competing for a grade or competing for the other's affection…they just never figured out how to call it even. The constant competition fueled who they were, as people and as the professional Quidditch players that they now were. _

_Out here in the real world it wasn't the Hogwarts' House Cup, and they kept telling the whole world they knew that, that the love they shared was stronger than any competition, but people knew them and they knew their history. Competiveness won over love…they just never got it to be the other way around. Maybe it was their egos, maybe they just didn't know any other way…whatever it was, it just had to stop now. _

_Would this change anything? Would the definite circumstances she was talking about really change anything, he wasn't sure, but a clear definite cut had to be better than this torture. He walked slowly up to her and reached for her hand. He tried not to let it get to him, how easily their fingers laced together. His eyes caught sight of the miniscule diamond again and a wave of memories washed over him. _

_Hogwarts was behind them and their uncertain future infront. The NEWTS they had strained their asses over didn't matter to them. All that mattered were the tryouts and the shitty reserve positions for low ranking teams. They were used to persistence, they were used to working hard, and they knew that as long as they kept pushing each other's buttons, they'd get somewhere someday. It was a horrible foundation for a relationship, and people like Albus didn't shy away from telling them that over and over again. It was good to give each other hope, it was good to strive for greatness, but passion fueled by the want to be the best was never going to amount to anything. They hadn't listened though. _

_Scorpius remembered the first time he kissed her. Just shy of thirteen they both were and he was determined to prove that he'd kiss a girl before she ever kissed a boy. Her being that girl had never crossed his mind before that. Then came their first night together during the summer before their seventh and final year; a drinking competition…both so heavily drunk, but still somehow able to remember every fiery kiss and burning touch. _

_Her head fell against his shoulder and without meaning too, his free hand held securely onto her waist. He brought up their entwined hand and for several moments they just stared at the small glistening diamond. Rose tried to picture her hand without it. Even during those awful fights where she chucked it across the room she felt incomplete without it. It was usually after he had stormed out that she walked with heavy steps to retrieve it and slowly slide it back on. Her stubbornness was strong, and she always told herself that it felt right when she herself decided to wear it again, but she could never admit how much she cherished the moments when he pleaded for her to take it back and slid it gently on himself. _

"_We weren't ready, were we?" _

"_Not ready…or just not right?" _

_She swallowed the lump in her throat and stepped away from his embrace. It was unconventional from the start what they had. People kept telling them to break it off entirely before they got in too deep, but like always, they did the opposite. They kept the physical relationship going, they let their emotions get involved, and then finally their families…that were still waiting for them. She meant it every time she said, I love you, but she often caught herself wondering if she was saying it to prove a point to the world or if it was genuine. It was the same thing for the yes to the proposal. The screaming match in their dingy little apartment, the dishes flying everywhere, and the insults should've been a dead giveaway…nothing good could come out of saying yes. Yet, she had just stared him down and refused to give him the gloating rights. It had been a challenge and she wasn't about to lose. _

_Yet, she had lost. _

_Several times. _

_Breakups before and after the proposal…she lost a piece of her heart every time. _

_She brought her hand up and slowly kissed the ring. The lump in her throat was getting more and more unbearable and the tears in her eyes stinging painfully. She usually refused to be the first to cry, but tonight had done such a number on her, and she didn't think she could last much longer. Everything was crumbling around her. _

_Yet, at the same time it wasn't. She was on top of the world, Puddlemere's star Seeker…the same position he held for the Arrow's. On and off the pitch…it was just always the same between them. _

"_I never meant to hurt you…it was never my intention, Rosie." _

_With watery eyes she faced him, energy draining from her body completely. "And I never intended on hurting you…but somehow we always manage to in the end. Whether with those harsh words or even those stupid flings in-between breaks….you were right, Scorp…constant heart and soul aching." _

_Then she saw them…the tears glistening in his eyes too. "What're we gonna tell them." _

_The tears broke loose then as her earlier words hit her ears. She didn't care at this point if she was the first to fall…she didn't care about anything anymore. "Like you said…the truth…the god awful truth we refused to believe all these years." Her hands frustratingly clenched onto her hair. "Damn! Why didn't we just listen…why did we put each other through this….Why-just why did you ever kiss me?" _

_She fell to her knees in uncontrollable sobs. He followed a second later, grasping her head forcefully so she had no choice but to look up at him. "Why-why did you make me fall in love with you?" He was pleading now, and as his grey eyes locked with her blue, he knew she was thinking about the exact moment he was. _

_No words had been exchanged and to the outside world it was the most insignificant of events, but he had a feeling it would be permanently imbedded into his mind. She had ruined him with that moment…no matter where they went from here, he swore every movement he ever had with another girl would be held to that standard, too bad it was forever unattainable. No other girl would be giving him the silent treatment like she had been, no other girl would ever look so good in his ratty old t-shirt, and no other girl, as furious as she had been, would sit across from him with a cup of tea after sliding him his own. It was within that brief glance they shared that they had unmistakably fallen in love with each other; despite the fact that another week or so passed before they uttered apologies. _

_He was always up for a challenge, but if he honestly thought about it…the challenge of moving on from that moment seemed so foolish, but not as foolish as trying to get it back. _

"_I shouldn't have said yes," she cried shaking her head. "You win-I lost…it's my fault. I shouldn't have said yes…we should've just stayed apart." Her head fell against his chest and her fists collided repeatedly. "I'm the idiot. I'm the idiot…we should've never set out to do what we knew could never happen." _

_Beautiful flowers, that five –tear cake, and her white princess dress passed through her mind. The images only made everything worse, especially the faces of their loved ones, who put so much effort into the event that wasn't going to happen tomorrow. _

"_I shouldn't have asked," he choked out. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head as tenderly as possible. So many situations. So many she won or he won situations, but never had they felt the effects of both of them losing. "I acted without thinking, Rose…the moving in together, the heated proposal….it was all on me, okay, it's my fault." _

_Their eyes locked and Scorpius was sure at that moment his heart would probably never repair itself. It was over. It was all finally over because they both finally admitted defeat. He could see the pain clearly in her eyes but somewhere in those aqua pools there was also spark of release. Her hands slowly unclenched his shirt and her gaze shifted as they rested on her lap. Tears were still falling down her delicate cheeks and he could barely hold his own back. _

_He had to be the one to do it. Not because he was the stronger of the two…or it hurt him less, but just because he couldn't bring himself to see her fall apart anymore. So he leaned forward and pressed his shaking lips to her forehead. His hands slid onto top of hers and her body shook with a new wave of sobs. She knew what was coming and there was nothing she could do about it. It was like she forgot how to breathe as he slowly slid her beautiful ring off her finger. _

_It had to be this way she kept telling herself, as his lips continued to kiss her forehead. The commitment waiting for them when the sun came up was just going to hurt them more. They couldn't go back and they couldn't go forward. The only challenge left was to cut away completely. She saw the ring disappear into his clenched hand but still couldn't bring herself to look down at her own hands. _

_They'd still see each other practically every day, they still had to compete on the pitch, but this time all the background emotions would be dissolved…a fresh start, no emotional attachments. _

_Their gazes locked and just for a brief second they were taken back to that moment. This time was different though. This time they both closed their eyes and let their lips come together for one last kiss. The feeling to- linger-to press harder-make deeper- was so strongly present, but just not strong enough. _

_In a daze Scorpius stood and helped her up as well. Their hands dropped to their sides and Rose kept her eyes away from his clenched hand. She tried to think back to what she would've been feeling if she knew she was still walking down that aisle tomorrow, but her mind seemed to have blocked out everything, everything except for where she was at this exact moment…and that was free. There was a lot of explaining to do and the first steps back to the Burrow seemed impossible, but for the first time they were both even; evenly broken and evenly relieved. _


End file.
